” Yesterday we opened up about how diabetes can bring us down. Today let’s share what gets us through a hard day. Or more specifically, a hard diabetes day. Is there something positive you tell yourself? Are there mantras that you fall back on to get you through? Is there something specific you do when your mood needs a boost? Maybe we’ve done that and we can help others do it too? (Thanks to Meri of Our Diabetic Life for suggesting this topic.) ”
My favourite “treat” chocolate is Haigh’s. Then comes Cadbury for mass consumption. Generally speaking, all other chocolate is consumed out of desperation because I don’t have Haigh’s or Cadbury close at hand! I can only say that Haigh’s is my favourite because I have tried so many varieties. It’s all relative.
For me, life with diabetes really isn’t that bad. Yes, I get frustrated. Yes, I hate the burden. Yes, I can’t stand the pressure of being responsible for so many aspects of my health that I actually have little control over. And then there is the guilt… But I have lived through events that making living with diabetes seem like a walk in the park.
In the space of 10 months, my husband and I miscarried three pregnancies in a row, and my Mum passed away very suddenly & unexpectedly. At the time, our daughter, Aspen was just starting out at kindergarten and if it weren’t for her excitement to attend, I’m not sure I would have gotten out of bed most mornings. There were days I just wished the sun would go down so I wouldn’t have to pretend to function in the real world. Then when the sun went down, all I wanted was for the world to be awake so I wouldn’t have to face the challenge of falling asleep and being alone with my desperation, confusion and loss. There was no escaping the relentless pain, misery and sadness that had taken up residence in every cell of my body.
Those tragic events were not related to my diabetes. If anything, diabetes was an obedient dog at my feet who followed me everywhere, went outside to wee and curled up on my lap at the end of the day. It really was one of the only constants I had in a world that had turned upside down before my very eyes. I knew it wasn’t going anywhere and I knew what to do to keep it tamed and on a leash.
When I have bad diabetes days, they really aren’t. Nothing about living with diabetes compares to that period in my life; it was an experience I wouldn’t wish on anyone. I chose to fight hard to find enjoyment, happiness and healthiness again.
My diabetes is manageable. It is reasonably obedient. And there is nothing about my diabetes that equates to loss on that scale. My life isn’t always about diabetes. When I catch myself starting to think that it is, I take a conscious moment to reframe.
For me, it really ain’t that bad.